July 18, 2008

limbo

I'm not really capable of forming the words I need right now. My mind, my life, my world is just in a state of confusion, worry and fear. Without getting into all the nitty gritty, Workers Comp is releasing W saying there is nothing else they can do for him. We know we'll have to file for disability, and we know we'll get denied and have to fight for it. I don't have that fight in me anymore. We know a settlement is on the horizon, but don't know how much, and once his weekly checks stop I have no clue how I'm going to pay the bills. If I'm away for longer than usual, it's because I just can't deal. I'm having a hard time dealing as it is. I see W slipping farther and farther away from himself every day and I fear I'll never have the real him back.

I also miss Bubba fiercely, he's still in PA.

1 comment:

Missy said...

I am so sorry. Why is life so hard? It seems like it knocks ya down every which way ya go. I wish we lived closer together. It would be nice to have a great friend close by, so we could have each others backs. You know that I am here if ya want to talk.